Maybe Larry Bird created Bitcoin? 🤷‍♂️

Brand Madness.

Move over Swelce, we’re taking this game indoors. More than ten million viewers will tune into NCAA’s March Madness tournament in the coming weeks. And while that’s a significantly smaller number than the Super Bowl’s 123 million average viewers, this is really an apples and oranges situation.

Let me explain. Where the big football game has one night to make a big impression, March Madness takes place over three weeks. That breaks down to 12 hours of basketball for each of the first four days, five hours a day for the Sweet Sixteen and Elite Eight, five hours for the Final Four and an additional three for the NCAA Championship game. That’s 76 hours of television in three weeks, all on the same few channels. To which I say… challenge accepted.

But all of those hours mean that much more opportunity for brands to get their message across to the clients. Effectively repetitive? Yes. The feeling that we’re being beat across the head with it? Also yes. CBS and TNT Sports reported they were “basically sold out” of ad inventory as of March 14. And Jon Diament, EVP of ad sales at Warner Bros. claims “this will be the best revenue tournament we’ve ever had.”

For a refreshing change of pace, advertisers are making it a point to play fair with men and women this year, placing an equal emphasis on both in their marketing. Powerade’s spot features two NCAA guards, Isaiah Collier from the USC men’s team, and Flau’jae Johnson from the LSU women’s team. Ritz used 16 college athletes for their campaign, including 8 men and 8 women. Even my math skills know that’s exactly even. And Marriot Bonvoy turned to coach Sydney Carter to lead their Game Day Rituals campaign. Fans can enter for a chance to win an exclusive experience at the women’s Final Four tournament in Cleveland, Ohio.

And in case you’re worried about going hungry the next few weeks, don’t be. The food deals are out of control. Wendy’s is offering customers $1 and $2 cheeseburgers exclusively via the Wendy’s app in honor of the big tournament. Buffalo Wild Wings is taking it a step further, and celebrating with their own special bracket. The restaurant had a real buffalo, Jack, pick a bracket for both the men’s and women’s tournament in a promotion the company is calling “Beat the Buffalo.” Fans have the opportunity to submit their own brackets, and “10% of challengers with a better bracket will have a chance to win bragging rights and some amazing prizes- a year’s worth of free wings and tickets to next year’s Final Four.” This a fun one, but a year’s worth of free wings? Is that not a health hazard?

It wouldn’t be a proper commercial roundup if we didn’t include the insurance guys. Because for every Buffalo Wild Wings commercial, there are three million GEICO spots (don’t look up that stat, just trust me). Their “However You Fan” commercial this year highlights the many ways to be a fan, whether you’re a trash talker, an emotional basket case, or incredibly superstitious. Give it a watch, even if just for the eight year old girl heckling the bench. Amazing.

IMHO, Larry Bird’s appearance in Allstate’s latest commercial takes the top prize this year. The NBA legend stars in the 30 second advertisement as himself, while Dean Winters (the Mayhem maker that we all love), represents an actual bird in the attic. The two face off, and obviously Mayhem does some serious damage. But the play on Bird’s name and March Madness/Mayhem? This is dad joke level expert. Trust me. I know.

Top Stories

More talk of the TikTok ban.

Raise your hand if you’re tired of hearing about a potential TikTok ban? Same. And to make matters worse, the House-passed bill that could ban the app in the US wont be taken up by the Senate any time soon. In fact, it could be months before any legitimate TikTok related legislation hits the floor.

Quick refresher. Government officials are increasingly worried that TikTok, which is owned by China-based parent company ByteDance, poses a national security threat to the US and its people. They are so worried, the US House of Representatives overwhelmingly passed a bill last Wednesday that would give ByteDance about six months to divest the US assets of the short-video app, or face a ban.

TikTok says the concerns are baseless. It notes that about 60% of the company is owned by global investors, and three members of its five person board are Americans. It also boasts that it has spent more than $1 billion on a plan that stores US sensitive user data domestically on servers operated by Oracle, the American cloud computing company.

The TikTok ban is just one of many of Washington’s recent moves in response to US national security concerns about China, from connected vehicles to advanced AI chips to cranes at US ports. And it’s not just one party sounding the alarms. The ban support has been bipartisan from the get go, with both Republicans and Democrats concerned about China’s influence.

It took me four years to figure out the Renegade dance, and now we decide to ban TikTok? Not cool.

Princess Kate has cancer.

After weeks of online conspiracies and rumors swirling, the truth behind Kate Middleton’s silence has come out- and it is certainly not a sigh of relief. On Friday afternoon, the Princess of Wales personally addressed speculations regarding her health in a video message. She revealed that she has been diagnosed with cancer, and is in the early stages of “preventative chemotherapy.”

In the heartfelt message, the princess revealed the diagnosis as a “huge shock” to her and Prince William. She explained the family’s need for time to process with their children, and a request for understanding their need for privacy as she seeks treatment and healing.

A little backstory. A royal ruckus was set in motion back in January when Kensington Palace announced that Kate underwent a “successful” abdominal surgery and was expected to remain hospitalized for two weeks. She was announced to return to public duties around Easter on March 31st. In late February, in an attempt to quiet rising speculation about the Princess’ health, the Palace released a statement indicating Kate was “doing well.” Shortly after, on March 10, Princess Kate returned to Instagram with a family photo, thanking the public for months of well wishes and support. Wild turn of events? The photos were quickly retracted for being clearly manipulated. Even wilder turn of events? Princess Kate posted on X an apology for causing confusion with the photos, blaming herself for a sloppy editing job. Which was super believable.

The mishap led to an internet firestorm, sparking wild rumors including an impending divorce due to Prince William’s affairs, troubles incurred from an eating disorder, a missing persons report, or even a haircut gone wrong. Tragically, the reality was incredibly sobering for everyone.

UK’s Prime Minister Rishi Sunak commented on the recent frenzy. “In recent weeks (the Princess) has been subject to intense scrutiny and has been unfairly treated by certain sections of the media around the world and on social media. When it comes to matters of health, like everyone else, she must be afforded the privacy to focus on her treatment and be with her loving family.”

Best of the Week

Sites to See

Hold the applause. We successfully launched Lyda Hill Philanthrophies’ new website last week and TBH, she’s a real beauty. Okay, you can applaud now.

Treat Trends

Twenty bucks says you’re reading this newsletter with a little treat in hand. Brands notice, and are increasingly marketing their everyday products as little luxuries. Could this work for you?

Smart Moves

Think With Google’s video marketing strategies explained, and then turned upside down. An informative read with concrete examples. Save this one for a rainy day.

Weekly Mix

Long live spring time in Texas. It might only last a couple of hours, but we’ll take it. Open those windows and cue up the March mix.

More News from the Week.

• The fascinating story of a Florida homeowner who is possibly winning the greatest game of chicken ever played.
• YouTube sensation Mr. Beast will have his own show on Amazon, where over 1,000 contestants will compete for a $5 million grand prize.
• Want your kids to vomit on Easter morning? This one’s for you!
• The bizarre trial of Craig Wright, who claimed to be bitcoin creator Satoshi Nakamoto, but isn’t.
• CosMc’s opened in Dallas on Tuesday. Lines in its new locations have had wait times for up to six hours. If we’re late for our next few meetings…just know it was for good reason.